REFLECTIONS ON WAITING

Time is a curious thing. When we are younger we see our life stretching out before us like a sprawling vista. As we get older, the patterns, routines and milestones can seem metronome like in their regularity and inevitably: school, university, career, marriage, children, retirement, death. But as anyone knows, life doesn’t follow neat patterns and curveballs can come that not only disturb the patterns but upend them completely.  Another truism is our approach to time completely alters with age. From having too much of it we morph to feeling we don’t have enough of it. Fears might creep in that we might leave this planet having failed to achieve what we felt called to do, or worse having felt that we were never called to do anything in particular to begin with. Today has had me thinking of time for many reasons: first it is the first Sunday of Advent, a time where Christians worldwide begin to prepare for Christ’s coming at Christmas, second because today to the day is 10 years since I began my journey as an accidental evangelist with the publication of my devotional, Heaven in Your Handbag and third this is also the day that would have been my mother’s birthday were she still alive. So, what are my reflections on the time that has passed, in the last decade or so, and  indeed the time one has left, and what does it speak to regarding a believer’s walk with the Lord?

A lot has changed since that cold winter’s day in 2006. For a start, I no longer live in Notting Hill, earning a living from a rewarding but precarious ‘portfolio career’, pin-balling from one disappointing date to the next, trawling the vintage stores for the perfect couture piece and spending my Sunday evenings chewing carpet at any number of churches (HTB, St. Mary’s and St. Paul’s – thank you!) and asking God the perennial ‘big questions’ “Lord, What next? Lord, Why not? And Lord, if not now When?” The questions are still there, if they’re not then I would challenge any believer that their faith isn’t growing, but my location has changed as has how I ask questions: I type this from my marital home in Lagos, Nigeria. If I was a betting lady, I would not have thought this is how it would all pan out (lest, I forget, I thought I’d already met ‘the one’ and he was just being obstinate and not going to Cartier quick enough), but, it was the very moment I stopped fixating in God answering my prayer like one would ask the waiter how you’d like a steak done (medium rare since you asked) I met my real-deal Boaz having moved to Nigeria based on just two things: a repetitive prayer prompting and a job offer. It was an adventure, and looking back spoke to what is so succinctly put in the book of Hebrews:

“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.” Hebrews 11:1

Since, my book’s publication I was sure that the shiny literary career would follow. After all, hadn’t the first fruits been for the Lord? Again, this was not exactly how it panned out; there was lot more interim but still perfect in his purpose work, a few vigorous jig for Jesus triumphs (a book tour, packed breakfast talks, the first Cool Chic and In Christ events where celebs rubbed shoulders with vicars, my first piece in a glossy fashion magazine), but there were also  a lot more disappointments, from losing my father, to close friends fading to black, and most surprising of all, fellow Christians attacking me when I dared to stand in my truth.  I say this not to create a martyrdom narrative from my experience but to illustrate that the walk, when you choose to completely follow it is never smooth. And some of those milestones I mentioned earlier do not always come exactly when you think they should, but with faith and perseverance will manifest at exactly the right point in time. I say not this as a ‘smug sorted’, I am still waiting and keeping it cheerful in the interim. For me, the only constant in everything has been Jesus. He was present in all my yesterdays and will be present in all of my tomorrows, it was bible verses that kept me going in times of trouble, it is worship songs that soothed my soul. Oftentimes, the Lord would plonk a random but divinely appointed stranger who would speak into my situations, but always, always Jesus was there, and he always cared and continues to do so.

So as Advent begins what can one hold onto in this time where we not only look back to Jesus initial arrival but look to his second coming too?

“Jesus went on to say, ‘In a little while you will see me no more, and then after a little while you will see me.’” John 16:16

Classic biblical exegesis will conclude that this statement from Jesus points to the resurrection, especially when one considers where it comes in the gospel story, but I would also say that it could also be taken to point to Jesus’ ascension and second coming. Time space continuums are not the same for God as they are for us, especially as he is the one who created and developed them. A millennium is not even an eye blink to the author of the universe. If we, feeble people who if we are lucky may get a good clear six or seven decades in good health on this beautiful planet were to take the concept of his imminent return seriously, there would be a lot more purposeful behaviour and a sense of urgency on fulfilling our callings. After all, who wants to be caught not just napping on the job, but not on the job at all?

So, as we wait on the things we have prayed for, are still praying for, have not yet thought to but most definitely will be praying for, the key is to stay enveloped in his love and focused on our purpose. I have decided to expand mine on the elegant evangelism tip, CCC now has an Instagram account – follow us on @coolchicandinchrist, and share with all the people who matter in your life. Let’s see if we can create a global movement and a digital home for fashion loving, champagne drinking, dance all night, on fire for the Lord sorts. Whatever you love doing and are innately gifted in, do it with gusto as this is probably exactly what God wants you to do. The final account for our lives is ours alone, and ancillary factors will not really come into it, so live it with as much joy and boldness as you possibly can, because he really is coming soon.